Is Your Teen Addicted to Their Screen?

First, we need to define addiction. Most likely, if your teen is on their screen 12 hours a day and cannot get off it, there is a problem. However, it doesn’t mean there is an addiction. Addiction would show up by the response when you start to limit screen time if you do it correctly. That IF is important. Suddenly announcing that you no longer are allowing your teen to be on their phone, social media, etc. for as long as they have been, especially if they are in mid-teens, will not be received well. Have a discussion with them first. Are they substituting this for real person to person contact? Are the majority of their “friends “people  whom they know only through social media but not in real life. Are they still active in real life activities? Are they functioning well in school? Do they have good life skills? 

If they are functioning well in school, have friends In the real world with whom they actively do things, are able to handle their emotions, don’t avoid unpleasant tasks, manage anxiety, etc., then the only worry would be the amount of time spent and the possibility of a future addiction, At this point, just keeping the lines of communication open is important but it may not be necessary to limit their screen time.

If, however, you find that their grades are slipping; they are isolating themselves; they are moody/depressed, etc,, then it is time to have that conversation and limit their screen time and require some real life activity. 

If as a result of their isolation, poor grades, avoidance patterns, you have a conversation and follow through with turning off their WiFi and they become violent- shove, push, throw things, then you know there is an addiction. Let them go through a withdrawal period (which means you consistently hold the line) , and if it is still a problem, then it is time to see a therapist….

A good book about having that conversation is SCREEN-SMART PARENTING by Gold. It divides the discussion into different age groups: the very young, 11-14, 15-17. Different age groups require different limitations and allowances. Social media, the phone, electronics, are here to stay, As parents, it is important to provide guidance within the context of acceptance